MIND-warp:::: words and coherent thoughts have left me... I am nothing but a vessel of life

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.

Elizabeth Kubler Ross

Some doodling of mine...

Just seconds before I wrote this post, I took the opportunity to read through some of the posts that my friends were publishing up on their blogs and I realised that the topics they wrote about, inane as some of them may be, actually are really good topics to read about simply because it is a true reflection of their thoughts. That lead me to the sad, depressing thought that the topics I write about don't really seem to matter. Sigh... maybe then its a true reflection of character because I don't believe as a person I am very warm, instead I think I tend to distance myself away from people. Every time I think of a new adventure I want to scribe down, I find my interest diverted somewhere along the path and it never gets "typed" down. Probably because of the laziness that propagates and resonates through all my cells.

Oh god... cells.... that word in itself conjures a huge, convoluted image of this mess of topics and ideas for the current subject I am taking this semester; Genes and Environment 650-1 l22. The exam is in about 3 days and I feelike I am trying to empty this bottomless wealth of constant knowledge. It seems to me that the more I dig through the mount, I find myself looking at more blockades and problems. I'm pretty sure it isn't suppose to be that way right? Maybe I am an Homo Floriensis after all. 380 ml for cranial size? Sounds about right don't you think? Certainly have the matching height as well! I really . really . really . couldn't care less about monkeys and parasites and fungi and magic mushrooms and spores and protists and all that stuff - the brilliant thing of course is that the less I care,e less I am enthused to learn about it which explains why I am now tip-tapping on my computer, procrastinating instead of working hard on all the above-mentioned stuff. I should really get a start on remembering all those protist parasites like apicomplexans or kinetoplasids or parabasilids.... (damn these names! damn their features! damn my craving for chocolate! haha XD)

But on the happier side. I think that birthday lunch plan is tentatively falling into place. It is odd to think I have never had a gathering like this for my birthday all my life simply because it was either during mock exams or during residentials which meant spending it away in some ulu place, camping out in the cold, or riding elephants, or even as in the TOK camp, answering really mind-wrenching questions like "why we exist and where does knowledge come from". So I'm super duperly excited! I'm hoping people don't cancel on me T_T. I know it is just a lunch but really it is a celebration of a new beginning - of my life in Melbourne and to thank my blessings that I have had the luck to meet so many awesome people in one year. Cynical as I am, I really do think the friendships I made in uni will last: hopefully for a lifetime. Who knows? Maybe I will wish for it at 11:11 on the 11th of the 11th month (while I'm crazily writing on my Bio paper). Anyways... good luck to all the sorry souls out there attempting to get through the exam period! I, on the other hand simply wish that I will chance on a 4-leaf clover right before the exam or perhaps find the end of a rainbow with its designated leprachaun guarding the pot of gold!