brain-dead..

I woke up this morning telling myself that today of all days would be a fruitful one. I will work hard, do what I set myself to do, you know yadi-yadi-yah. It doesn't even take a monkey to guess how the day instead unravelled out. So yeah add in a couple dramas, a lot of chatting on MSN and in the middle of that watching some Master Chef. So yes, another really 'fruitful' day comes to end. 

The worse thing about it is that I have this overwhelming feeling of guilt that I know can only be gotten rid off through making sure I actually do something besides laze around with my brain power placed at its minimum level. I need the motivation though! There must be something out there that can plug in some power voltage in me to send in that extra buzz I really need. It's a pity that the only form I have found so far comes in a can labelled 'Red Bull' and no, I am not that desperate (yet). 

To be honest though, what actually motivates people? I mean, yes there is this whole topic of it in management and business where you study all those theories like Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, or MacGregor's Theory of X and Y or even Hertzberg's Hygiene Theory but in real life, beyond that of the working world, what motivates us as people, or in my case... as students? I know that in the long term we should reap rewards and benefits after the hard work placed in. But what is in it for the short term? That I would love to know. Or to emphasise that, I NEED to know. All I see at the moment is this large hill that I have to climb and I'm no where near the top; still standing at the foot of it wondering what lies at its peak. 

Well another day has ended and I can't buy back its time or make sure that the clock's hands are twirled back. All that's left is to look forward to another day and wonder what promises I'll make to myself this time!